It was mid December night, time was around half past 2am.Wind was chilly, and atmosphere was cold. But, strangely enough i was not feeling cold, in spite of light apparels. The cold water of river Mahanadi was gently lapping my feet. And I was lying on its stony bank for nearly about two hours, staring blankly at vast sky above me. The sky was brightly illuminated with stars, and the moon as usual pivoted in the center. Nothing has changed…and nothing ever will….But, Something had broken ,deep inside me.. I was lost that day, kept staring at the vast emptiness above me, wondering if there was any space for me among those tiny smiling stars. The bank of river was near to the busy NH5.
On the other side of the NH, there was a cremation ground and a park, both adjacent to each other. Even at this unearthly hour, NH was brightly light. People gather sometimes, for some cremation purposes, or offer puja at the near by temple. Usually some activities goes on all through out the night.
But, that night unusually it was secluded and I was alone, Far away from lighted NH, in an unlit area of the bank. I was lying there all alone, with the cold currents of the river .I was a broken guy that day…nothing had worked out with me…. I had failed to secure a good rank at JEE, for the 2nd consecutive time. All my hard work, labor … had gone down to the drain!!!!
My friends had done well and they were rejoicing…why not?? They got their rewards, but I felt dejected. And now.. I was here all alone. I felt i could not show my face to my parents or friends anymore. Moreover i wouldn’t be able to get through IITs my dream institutes……I didn’t know what will happen next, my world had came to a grinding halt….the road ahead was pitch dark, and I was all LOST…….
I had decided to come here, at this point of time ,alone with a thought. A thought to finish myself, once and forever. Probably, to finish my woes once and for all…………………..
I was lying down there with tears in my eyes, summoning enough courage to finish the task.
Finally I made up my mind; it had to be done…….
“SATYA“ someone called!!!.
Astonished, I turned around… It was HER ….She was standing behind me smiling.
She had the same big thoughtful eyes, light lips, long hair, n chubby cheeks……the moon light was faint, but I could make out distinctly, it was HER!!…
But, what was she doing at this point of time??? And that too here??
I looked at the road, near the lamp post, a blue car was parked, I could make out from a distance, few people were standing near to it, n they looked to be her parents. They might be going for a long journey, so they must have stopped by the temple to offer some prayers. It’s a usual practice for people going for long drives. She must have seen my cycle near the road and come up here to search for me. She was fearless, and also She knew where I would be when I wanted to be alone……………..
She was the only one who, knew me…I met her in college, 2 yrs ago. What happened after that,, I don’t know but we became good friends. She was like a fresh flower in early morning, full of freshness and life. Living cheerfully in a world that was so cold!!
She was like warmth to every soul…moreover she was my good friend….We used to talk hours together, n time would pass away like moments.
But I had lost contact with her few months back, her family had moved to a different place, few months back…and I had my JEE so couldn’t talk to her much. But the day, before she left, I returned her a “RS 5” coin. I owed her.
She had refused, saying “In Friendship no thanks no sorry”
And I like an idiot, had said, the coin was “my friendship” and she has to keep it.
She kept it silently. And I left!!!
After that I got busy somehow…and she was away to someplace, so I lost contact for sometime..
I was running behind my dreams, the IIIT’s, I had to be there anyhow….and slowly lost touch with the reality. I forgot everything including her.
Somehow today I was missing her deep beneath.
I wanted to meet her once before leaving this world.
And like a miracle….she was near me, when I needed her the most……
She sat beside slowly placing her soft hand in my hand as old time,,,,,
I couldn’t control myself and tears started welling down from my sore eyes, I cried liked a child crying in mothers Lap…..
She didn’t say any thing but just clasped my hands …My heart opened up,
And I told her everything crying intermittently. She kept listening quietly, just holding my hands…………
After sometime, she took my hands n stood up, I stood up behind her and started walking. She didn’t say anything but took my hands and walked across to the sandy part of the bank. We walked together holding hands along the wet sands of the river like we used to once long back…
I felt a little bit lighter walking beside her side some of my pains got washed away in my tears…And again., She was like a fresh air to me, once again she was with me , when I needed her ……When I wanted to meet her for the last time..
She stopped for a while and turned towards me….I looked into her round eyes…it was filled with tear….Astonished I asked “WHAT HAPPENED?”
She said “Please,,,Don’t ever think to give up your LIFE” slowly,,,I asked “Why???”
She pressed something into my hands and
“LIFE is Valuable, Live it? Some don’t even get to Live Even if they want to.”
I felt something in my hands, she had given me something.
I tried to make it out.. But I couldn’t in moon light…I looked up to ask her…….But, she was nowhere!!!!!!!!!!!
I thought her parents must have called and so she would have run off…
Slowly I walked towards the road hoping to say her “Bye” atleast…
I walked towards their car parked beside the road, All her family were there, her father, her mother, her little brother SIBU all standing still and staring towards the park…..
I looked for her. She was no where.
I went too little sibu knelt beside him and asked “WHERE IS DIDI??”
With tearful eyes he pointed towards something……………………
I looked up and that direction and saw a bon fire of some sort.
Closely I tried to look through my tired eyes.
Nooooo, it was the cremation fire!!!!!!!!
I was shocked completely!!!
I felt dizzy and I sat down.
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing she was no more…….
I didn’t have any tears left and I could cry. I didn’t know what to do.
My mind went back to old times.
I realized, when I had gone to meet her for the last time, she was ill with something, TB maybe, but she was under treatment. Doctors had told she would be well soon.
But somehow she knew it. How could it be like that she was so full of life!!!
She never let me realize, she was ill she wanted me to be happy always..
And she left me.
I felt myself shivering. How could she leave me?!!!.
Something fell from my hand, it rolled onto the ground. I looked at it. It was the same “RS 5 ” coin. I had given her as our “friendship bond”…
She couldn’t leave this world before breaking the friendship. She had come back to return it to me.
But before leaving she taught me the value of Life.
It is because she had lost it. She wanted to live with me, but she couldn’t.
My friend had left this world, but she left with me, the FRIENDSHIP, something that could not perish.
I turned around wiping my tears started walking back, towards a new life.
Holding the coin, firmly in my hand.
— By Satya.